I think in the last 2 months, I’ve learned many many skills in anger management, mainly just from myself. It is amazing how much will power you can exert on yourself when you try not to escalate your anger. I’m not usually very good at controlling my anger or frustration, but here are some tips from me on how to actually do it. This is for those situations in which all you can do is absolutely seethe and keep your angry feelings hidden because you can’t express it or direct it at anyone.
1. Listen to music – Softer acoustic music will make you smile, but sometimes even good ol screaming music will do great when you just need to jump into your car and yell out your frustration. For acoustic, I’d suggest City and Colour or Jason Mraz. For angry screaming music, definitely pick up some Alexisonfire or System of a Down
2. Go shopping… for anything – Its amazing how shopping will make you feel better. I think its the sense of accomplishment. And then getting to show it off to the friends who actually care about you afterwards =)
3. Call up a friend far, far away – Your friends who keep up long distance friendships with you and refuse to let you dissappear because you moved away are the ones you really want to keep. They’re also the ones who will listen when you call them up and say “Holy shit… I’m going to explode…. argh!”
Thanks Leizanne & Neal =)
4. Do something new every weekend – Take it from me, finding something new and exciting to do every weekend has been the highlight of my summer. I’ve never had such a fantastic summer and its all due to the positive attitude of just living life!
5. Blog - like I am now. On a blog that no one ever reads and no one will comment on. But you will know you had the satisfaction of writing all this shit down somewhere.
6. Lie outside in the sun – Soak up those happy vitamin D’s!!! I swear, the myth about lack of vitamin D causing depression is completely true. Therefore its very important to get lots of it! Especially in summer!
7. Whatever you do, don’t yell at or confront the person who is making you upset. Doesn’t matter who it is, you’re better than that. You can resolve the issues without dealing with someone who is acting immature. If it is absolutely necessary, talk to the person civilly and carefully. No swears, no insults, no biting remarks.
8. Do NOT go bitching around to every single one of your friends continuously. They care enough to hear it quietly and briefly… if you keep going on and on about it, they’re going to stop listening. You’re also going to make them uncomfortable if you are tattling on someone else. They are then forced to pick sides and you’ve now ruined their day.
9. Immerse yourself in work – nothing like feeling you got something accomplished at work or at school when you’re frustrated. Starting something and finishing it will take your mind of your worries and make you realize, all that anger wasn’t worth it in the first place.
10. Lastly and most importantly – continuously remind yourself that being angry isn’t worth it. It makes you feel down on yourself and you just add stress to your body. That stress can lead to getting sick or make you distracted from the things that are really important. Remember, being happy is better than anything, so work really hard to keep it that way!
There ya go. Even writing that felt good! Haha
That all being said, after everything that has gone down, I have to say one thing: I won’t get angry anymore, I’ll move past this stage. But I doubt I will ever, ever forgive you for everything you have managed to do… not just for the last 2 1/2 months and with all the people I’ve lost, but for all the other reasons you are aware of and you refuse to admit. And I won’t be mad about that anymore because I’ve realized that I have just accepted that.
